I’m back everyone!!! Did you miss me?
I apologize for not posting on here for over two weeks. I actually started a post after the Oscars and ended up not finishing it. Quite a few things were going on in my otherwise mundane life. Things that prevented me from even considering writing a semi-witty post. If you read my Tumblr or follow me on Twitter you’d know that there was something going on with The Ex. That was the main issue at play in the posting delay. I think I’ve wasted enough metaphorical ink on her though so I won’t go into all the details. Suffice to say that the stuff happening between us for most of the past two weeks put me in a little mini spiral of depression.
* This image came from the Hyperbole & a Half blog
However, you guys I am glad to let you know that sometime late last week, I think I finally came back up, broke through to the other side and am in the light now!
For real this time!
I mean, yeah, these past two weeks I came to accept that the ex was indeed my first love. It was love that I felt for her. I didn’t want to accept it because I couldn’t believe that I fell in love so fast. I loved her, I love her now still and I don’t think I will ever stop loving her. A part of me will always love her. They say the first cut is the deepest and that’s why it has taken me so long to get over her. BUT it’s time to move on. Last week at some point while I was lying down in the bed, completely and utterly depressed, after overthinking everything about our latest interactions, I just decided to A) get up off the bed and B) move on and stop letting stuff she does affect me. I’m done wallowing over someone who doesn’t feel the same way about me.
I’m better than that!
Since I made that decision, rainbows, fairies and happy thoughts have taken over all my cloudy days and most of my dark nights.
I know that I’m on the right path because her actions no longer affect me even half as much as they did before. That alone makes life grand!
In other news, the company seems to be keeping me as a backup option or something. They keep pushing back the date when they say they’ll make their decision. And then they proceed to break their new decision date. I think that, at best, I am their number two choice and they are just waiting on their number one choice to accept their offer before they definitively tell me no. So I’ve given up on them. And I’ve given up on the US. I’m gonna go back to the country where my parents now live (which I’ll finally tell you is The Great White North) and try my luck there.
Not to worry though. I’m not feeling too bad about leaving. In fact, I’m pretty damn excited.
Life is still uncertain and I’m 200% sure it will not be a bed of roses in the new city. But I’m excited to be returning to a cool city. I’m looking forward to seeing my family again (even if I’m not looking forward to actually living with them per se). I’m excited to be going back to a city with great diversity and awesome public transportation. I’m excited to be looking for jobs, knowing I can apply to any and all without worrying about my visa status affecting my odds of getting an offer. And I’m excited about trying to have a social life there once I settle a bit. Most of all, I’m just excited for the change.
The last 3 times I moved I was pretty sad. The move from Paris back to my grad school town was bittersweet, the move from my grad school town to a new city for work was downright depressing and the move from the new city to my current city in the South was sad. So I’m glad to have my traveling mojo back!
I’ll keep you peoples posted of course. Just continue reading this blog to make me happy and let’s keep this symbiotic (big words!) relationship on the road!